This from La Shawn Barber:

    "With politically correct pabulum flowing through the streets like raw sewage, we’re knee-deep in crap, and people from the highest office to the lowest rung are afraid to call it crap."

   Whew! "like raw sewage"!   Read the whole thing. Love that La Shawn

   I heard Steve Hayward discussing his new film An Inconvenient Truth or a Convenient Fiction on Prager yesterday. Here's thelink to his 50 minute rebuttal to Al Gore's hysteria in google video format.

   Joe Frances is the guy responsible for bringng porn into our living rooms with his Girls Gone Wild video ads.  Joe decided to get testy and mouth off to the judge during negotiations regarding a law suit brought by several underage girls featured in one of his videos. The judge brought contempt of court charges, and big bad Joe cried like a girl during his recent sentencing. 
    Am I a bad person for enjoying this immensely?

   I just saw this at foxnews.com regarding  a vote of no confidence in the administration by rank and file border guards. . My blood boils everytime I think of those two guys being convicted, so I'm glad to see the guys on the ground are fighting back. The day I become president I'll double their pay and treble their force.

April 23, 2008

   In the year since federally mandated limits were placed on toilet paper in response to singer Sheryl Crow's suggestions there are wide spread reports that our national hygiene standards have plummeted.
   Laundresses nationwide are struggling to cope with the surge in skid marks (aka tiger stripes) which are a direct result of the "One Square" policy.  "I've not seen anything like this since he was 5yrs old" said Mary Smith of her now college age son.  She now spends twice as much time, electricity and water keeping up with the mounting workload.
    As an unintended consequence of the regulation ecologists are reporting more incidents of phosphate contamination in the country's rivers and lakes due to the increased use of laundry detergents. Major fish kills have resulted in tons of rotting flesh releasing greenhouse gasses into the atmosphere. Meanwhile, sales have tripled for the makers of popular brands. 
    There are also complaints of marked oderiferousness in all 50 states. " I went to the movies the other night and couldn't even sit through the first 10 minutes" claimed Biff Stone in Cedar Bluffs, Iowa.  Oddly, ranchers, dairy farmers, and the French claim not to notice.
  

Chip's Faves


Favorite Blog Post Regarding France


    
   Anyone who knows me knows of my contempt for European idiocy,  and France holds an especially loathsome status in my pantheon of losers. Michelle Malkin has a fun wrap up of French fecklessness and their up-coming elections.


Favorite Stand Up Guy: Liviu Librescu
 
   College professors don't readily spring to mind as heros in these days of campus vacuousness, but Liviu Librescu, Romanian immigrant, holocaust survivor, and Professor of Engineering Science and Mechanics at Virginia Tech earned that title this week when he sacrificed his own life in order to buy time for his students to escape the psychotic gunman. There are no words for my admiration. 

Favorite Insane Democratic Misadventure

   This one was easy: Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid declares defeat. Yes, Harry daintily lifted his skirt for Islamo Fascists everywhere by declaring the war lost during a news conference this week. Typical Democratic machismo.  Nancy Pelosi and  Barbara Boxer are rumored to be burqa shopping this weekend. As Left Coasters, I'm sure they'll pull the look off with panache, but in terms of fabulousness, they don't even place a distance second to France's lefty femme fatale.


Favorite Name Change

   "Silky Pony"  is out. "Pink Sapphire" is in. Politics is FUN!


Hollywood Morons of the Week: Sheryl Crow & Laurie David
  
   Sheryl Crow struck first earlier in the week when she suggested that everyone cut down to one square of toilet paper per visit in order t o combat global warming. The best quote I've heard thus far was on Fox News this morning when a caller stated that "if I ever meet Sheryl Crow I'm not sure if I'm going to shake her hand". 
   But wait! That's not all! Over the weekend she and eco buddy Laurie David, producer of An Inconveinent Truth confronted Karl Rove at the White House Correspondents dinner to suggest that he "take another look at global warming". Such class. 
    Let's reverse this scenario, shall we? Say Limbaugh and Coulter confront Sean Penn at a Hollywood charity fund raiser to suggest he "take another look at reality". How appropriate would the left find that? Hmmmmmm?
   In any case, congratulations to Laurie and Sheryl, Hollywood Morons of the Week! 

 

   Last night I watched Andrei  Markovits discussing his newest publication  Uncouth Nation: Why Europe Dislikes America on C-SPAN. This guy's obviously a lefty, but didn't seem especially rabid and did have some interesting things to say.
   According to Markovits there is at present a resentment of America far worse than he's ever experienced in a life time of constant travel between this continent and that. Further, this sentiment is more pronounced among the elites than the working class. In fact, the more education one attains in Europe, the more anti-American one becomes.  And this recent exacerbation of the long held contempt in the hearts of our European brothers can, according to Andrei, be laid at the feet of the Bush administration - the living embodiment and confirmation of these morons view of us as boorish, uncultured reprobates.  Tsk, tsk, tsk.

    Now, this is Europe . E. U. R. O. P. E.  The same continent currently committing cultural suicide in the face of Islam. Wow!  Nothing new here except the upswing, of course. Europe has long held these attitudes.  Only one of the many Western Europeans I knew in college ever had a good thing to say about us. (On the other hand, my Polish buddy Rafal was quite the huge Ron Reagan fan.) They habitually carped about everything from the quality of American bread and beer to American's disinterest in the the "rest of the world" to the intense Georgia humidity. Oy!

     Personally, I'm not too bothered. The greater the distance we can put between our culture and theirs the better. I thank God for that my ancestors had the presence of mind to shake the dirt of the Old World off of their shoes and board ships for the new.

     Moreover, when I hear these things I grow quite smug in the knowledge that very soon these same European elites will no longer be able to avoid the devil at their door - a devil they invited in  and now don't have the courage or good sense to confront. They will be awakened from their torpor and realize they need rescue from a boogie man they fostered in their midst- Just as they did in 1939 and thereafter. And in that moment I predict that this vapid anti-Americanism will evaporate, and they'll  come a callin', hat in hand, to seek our help. (And I have to chuckle, because they'd better hope there's a Republican administration in power that day. )

    So, we'll ride to the their aid once again. And after order has been restored and the interlopers sent packing I'm sure there will be a few years of  fairly good will towards us before they get back to the usual business of hanging out on the left bank smoking Gauloises while scowling at the world.

 I grew up in a time of great atrocity. The following were standard practices in the public schools in which I received my education in the 1960s and 70s:


Students were held to a high standard of conduct and made to understand that they would face real and immediate consequences for failure to maintain this standard.   Even the mildest displays of disrespect to teachers were met with immediate response. Cheating and plagiarism were not allowed and were always punished when detected. 

Students were responsible for their own behavior, and weren't afforded the option of employing any "protected group" status to excuse low performance and/or disruptive behavior.  

Parents and school officials were empowered to administer actual physical punishment to students in response to rule infractions. No kidding, children were actually stuck with wooden paddles on those occasions when milder tonics failed to cure. The horror! We actually lived in fear of this happening and altered our behavior accordingly.

 Schools focused on teaching reading, writing, and arithmetic and left development of self-esteem and emotional well being to parents.In my public school system students were actually exposed to prayer on a fairly regular basis. Really.  

  American history was taught from a pro-American persecutive, and we learned to appreciate the insight of our founding fathers who created this great nation and the inestimable courage and sacrifice of those who have defended it since.  

We were allowed to frolic in the virtual killing fields of 1960s playgrounds.  Each piece of equipment more dangerous than the next: swing sets, see saws, merry go rounds, and (gasp) the dreaded monkey bars. The carnage was horrific. Barely a week went by with out a skinned knee, a bumped head, a bruise. 


    I'm not making this up. All of these things that the todays liberals, attorneys, and the ACLU would have you believe are atrocities and have effectively wiped out in modern society were actual everyday occurrences in those dark days.
   My God, how did we ever survive? 
   Funny thing is, not once during those years or the years before did any of my classmates fly off the tracks and open fire on each other in some pointless, insane gesture of adolescent angst. Not once.   
   Students didn't attack their teachers, and insomuch as they attacked each other, it was of the bloody nose variety. News cameras were not summoned, and law suits were not filed for these trifling altercations. Nobody died.
   We actually feared punishment because we knew it would be real and immediate. Neither our parents or any community activists would ride to our defense with treats of legal action if we decided to show our butts.. Screw up you'd pay. No ifs, ands, or buts.
   Is it possible that the sweeping liberal changes in how our educational system operates might play some small role in creating this unstable milieu in which children are moved to act so insanely?     
  Correlation doesn't prove causation, of course. So I'll leave it to you, the reader, to draw your own conclusion. Keep in mind that the common denominator in these incidents is that they took place at school

UPDATE:
   Here's an interesting somewhat related article by Jeff Zaslow at the Washington Post (subscription required).  Hat tip to Dean Barnett.

 Chip's Faves

( Note: Back in college I sometimes posted a list of "Chip's Favorites" on my dorm room door. Just my wry take on  some the more absurd news and cultural happenings of the day. Everyone and everything was fair game. Jose Napoleon Duarte, James Watt, Reagan, vaginal herpes medication ads, et. al. all took a turn being lampooned. So I'm thinking I'll resurrect that practice here in the blogosphere. Hope y'all enjoy - Chip )





Favorite Delusional Public Figure
   Taking her place among the many Napoleons, Anastasias, and Christs among us is Nancy Patricia D'Alesandro Pelosi, Congressional representative from California’s 8th district and current Speaker of the House of Representatives. God bless her, some time since the November elections the stress of her position has brought on delusions that she’s the President of the United States. This fact became evident when, on April 4, she jetted off to Syria for a chummy coffee klatch with President Bashar al-Assad. Not content with merely gifting the terrorist enabling Assad with a gold plated propaganda opportunity, she also managed to utterly misrepresent Israel’s intentions toward Syria.
Look for her to soon show up for work one morning at the White House and attack gate security with her cell phone when challenged. Heads up, DNC, it’s time for an intervention.







Favorite Newest Victim(s) _ Rutgers Player “Scarred for Life”
Last week a second rate radio show host made a vile, racially tinged comment in reference to the Rutgers women’s basketball team on MSNBC and CBS radio. He’s gone now, but apparently one player is taking this sort of hard.
Well, welcome to The Show. You’re in the big leagues now, and I’m sure that this incident, played well, will provide you with years of celebrity victimhood and its attendant absolute moral authority. Kia you’re a young, talented woman. I have every confidence that you're tougher and better than this. Seriously.




Favorite Stand Up Guy - Jason Whitlock
   Jason fired a very welcome broadside at race baiters everywhere in his commentary at kansascity.com this week. Go read it, and I'm sure you'll join me in my admiration for Jason's strait talk and courage in the face of the hoards of the politically correct. Stand by for the counter-attack, Jason. I got your back, buddy.


Favorite Insane Democratic Misadventure - IPods for Michigan
     Admittedly, with so many, many examples to choose from,  finding a winner in this catagory was tough. But this week it's going to Michigan for what has to be one of the most bizzare boondoggles of all time. They're proposing spending $38 million to outfit every school child in the state with an IPod. HOLY COW! Never mind the billion dollar deficit and an economy hopelessly in the toilet. Bring on them IPods! I'm sure there some shaky rationale they're offering for the move, but you and I know that for every kid that downloads something educational, there will be 10,000 loading up on Snoop Dog.




Favorite Undeclared Candidate for POTUS
  Fred, Baby! Fred!

Frank J over at IMAO has kept me laughing lately with his daily Fred Thompson Facts. A couple of my favorites:

* When terrorists get to the afterlife, they'll find that none of their seventy-two women are still virgins. Why? Because of Fred Thompson.

* Fred Thompson can open clamshell packaging without the slightest trouble.

Y'all go check 'em all out!

  It is the universities for whom we should worry. They lack the courage to defend the freedom without which they cannot live.


   That quote is from David Frum at National Review online. San Franciso State finally dropped disciplinary actions againt members of their College Republican's last week after suffering tons of bad press. Seems SFSU considers Hamas and  Hezbollah flags sacred symbols above desecration. I don't imagine they hold any such affection for the Stars and Stripes.   
   I wish I could say that blatant abuses of students freedom of speech and assaults on sanity were isolated to San Francisco State University. After all, you expect such inanity from the Bay area. But collegiate wars on truth are a nationwide phenomenon. Depressing.
  I'm  heartened, though, by the dedication of organizations like F.I.R.E. and individuals like David Horowitz for keeping up the fight. F.I.R.E.s efforts on behalf of beleaguered students are nearly universally successful, making the misguided efforts of university administrators and professors doubly baffling. They always lose in both the court of law and the court of public opinion. How much more prestige must be lost and money wasted before these effete, isolated morons clue in to reality? Alumi, remember this next time they're soliciting your contributions.
 

    Rats! I was all set to offer, via this blog, to sell Al Gore carbon offsets based on quitting my job and saving the whopping nine tons of CO2 I selfishly spew into the atmosphere with my Dodge V8 during my 50 mile daily commute (round trip). Then I looked up the going rate for these indugences and my 9 tons would only bring  a measly $50 tops in the current offset market. FIfty lousy bucks! Double rats!!  Just when I think I've found the ticket to easy street reality bites me in the backside again!
   

 

If Europeans won’t fight for their past (their parents) or their future (their progeny), one is forced to ask: For what will they fight?

   Joseph Puder has an interesting look at the European Union at 50 over at Frontpage. Well worth the read.

"They believe the world is run on wishes and that they will always have three more"

  I came upon American Digest today by way ofJunkyard Blog, and was blown away by that line referring to anti-war protesters. LOVE IT!  Read the entire post. Well worth your time.

 

File this one under the "Socialism kills everything it touches" tab:

Freight giant UPS has pulled the plug on an order for 10 A380 aircraft from the French company Airbus following a similar cancellation by FedEx. I’d never presume to claim any sophistication as a business analyst, but this has to be a huge blow for an already benighted company.

At issue is the inability of Airbus to deliver the goods on time:

UPS said it had intended to complete an internal study of whether it could wait until 2012 for the aircraft, but now understands Airbus is diverting employees from the A380 freighter program to work on the passenger version of the plane.

Again, I’m no expert. Certainly many, many variables factor into the circumstances a manufacturer faces at any given time. That said I wonder how much responsibilty this sort of foolishness bears in the Airbus debacle? A lot, I'm betting.  France continues to foment an environment increasingly hostile to business and madly indulgent of labor. How long before this house of cards collapes? The symptoms of decay are there for all to see, yet the inanity continues unabated.